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People enter into disputes in order to defend their point of view, as well as to show the flaws of the opponent’s arguments. To win the dispute, prepare facts that prove your case. It is also necessary to identify the weaknesses of the arguments of the opposite side. Use reliable sources of compelling evidence and relevant examples to find strong evidence. Do not get angry during disputes, as this is a sure way to defeat! Try to always control yourself.
1. You need to be able to argue
The main idea should be present in the dispute. One person expresses it as correct and gives his arguments, another (or others) refutes it with the help of his evidence or agrees with the first if his arguments outweigh.
Often people argue about anything, that is, each about his own, perceiving the subject of the dispute subjectively. Figuratively speaking, one proves that the subject is warm and the other is soft. Or one says sour and the other long.
In order to bring undeniable arguments and win the dispute, you need to be competent enough and be able to think logically. The ancient Greek sages who lived before our era and created sophistry science, dealing with the skillful persuasion of one or several opponents, were distinguished by the ability to cunningly dispute.
For example, Socrates said that if we need to get a positive answer from the interlocutor, we must first ask him two questions, to which he is guaranteed to answer “yes”. And only then - the main one, to which he will automatically respond with consent. There may be more questions. In a dispute, these issues may represent our arguments. And then the opponent will not notice for himself how he recognizes our point of view as correct.
2. Respect the opinions of others
A dispute is an attempt by the parties to consider the problem as comprehensively as possible in order to make the right decision. This is not a settling of accounts, not an intention to demonstrate that "I am here alone smart, and you are all fools."
However, there are many people who are in a hurry to be the first to express their opinion. They shout, interrupt, and, speaking out, they no longer want to listen to anyone. “There is only my opinion and the wrong,” they show with all their appearance.
Watching those who behave so incorrectly, I really want them to be wrong, even if their arguments are rational and logical. It is difficult to agree with their opinion, because, admitting that they are right, we will give them a reason to wave a victorious flag over a defeated self.
We will not be like them - we will listen to the opinion of the opponent. We show him that it is interesting to us. We ask why he thinks so, we regard his position as possible, and then together we look for ways to reach consensus.
3. Do not get personal
Proving, in our opinion, the fallacy of the opponent’s point of view, one cannot use his nationality, physical disabilities, profession, etc. as an “argument”.
But quite often people who do not have good arguments or the necessary knowledge, but do not want to admit their wrong, resort to "heavy artillery", using forbidden techniques. “You were just like a fool, so you stayed with them”, “Well, you are not an idiot to think like that” - and now the topic of the dispute has already been forgotten, a conflict erupts with mutual insults.
In no case is it worth mentioning relatives: “You are as absurd as your mother”, “You think as badly as your father.” Such a transition to individuals will turn a constructive debate into a scandalous disassembly.
The danger in the dispute is represented by such words as “always” and “never”: “You have always been hysterical”, “You will never listen to me” - such “arguments” can lead even the most tolerant ones out of themselves.
4. Do not resort to blackmail
Among the unlawful tricks that force the opponent to give up despite their own point of view is blackmail. Blackmailers resort to different methods. For example, they intimidate: “If you do not support my point of view, you will greatly regret it (you are in great trouble).” They try to shame, arouse a feeling of guilt: "Your parents would know that you had deceived their expectations, changed their ideals." They put on a victim’s mask: “I feel so bad, but it will be easier for me if you agree with me.”
Most often, blackmail appears in a latent form, with the help of hints.
5. Do not insist on
If our opponent, after listening to our arguments, remains unconvinced, there is no need to continue to convince him. After all, the more persistently we do this, the more stubbornly he will resist. And defending his opinion will become for him a matter of principle. He will protect him, even realizing that he is wrong.
Their main arguments should be given at the beginning and at the end of the discussion - so their weight will only increase.
6. Use non-verbal ways to influence the interlocutor
FirstlyIt matters how we look. A sloppy man dressed as a homeless person, but convincing us that we are spending money incorrectly, I would like to ask: “If you are so smart, why so poor?”
Secondly, for the victory in the dispute, the way the debaters present themselves is also important. We do not want to recognize the truth of people with aggression in their voices, closed gestures, sullen eyes, unfriendly facial expressions. And we’ll do it a lot more willingly if friendliness, calmness come from a person, if we like him and we want to imitate him.